“Like wildflowers; You must allow yourself to grow in all the places people thought you never would.” – E.V.

It’s finally summer in San Diego and I am reflecting on my Spring – a season of blooming. I finished out another snowboarding trip, found more of myself in India, took on new work clients and projects, continued my strength training / Achilles healing, celebrated another year around the sun, and connected with friends in meaningful ways.

This blooming is not a passive act though. After all, flowers don’t bloom without sunshine, water, and a little TLC. The same is true for me. In Spring, I continued the practice of running towards myself at full speed, diving into the cracks and crevices of my being and examining, probing, mending, stitching, and loving all the parts, big and small, broken and intact.

I released grief I had been holding onto about my grandfather’s death and funeral 43 years ago. I processed parts of the ending of my marriage I had swept aside seven years ago. I reconciled the betraying of myself in a relationship where I tried to play both martyr and savior. Spring was a reminder of the cyclical nature of grief – a lesson I continue to marvel at.

All this dirt digging is part of me allowing for Expansion (my word for 2023).

It connects me to my heart, reminding me that living open-hearted is both hard and beautiful. I feel more, and sometimes that means I hurt more.

Like a flower bending toward the sun, I feel myself stretching into the next version of who I want to be. I call her Rachel 3.0 and this is what she looks like:

• A woman with a lionness heart, entirely unaffected by the opinions of judgements of others, while releasing judgements myself.

• A woman who lives in my truth all the time, never betraying myself for the sake of people pleasing or emotionally managing others.

• A woman who says no to anything and anyone that makes me feel small.

• A woman who knows the best way to serve the world is to consistently operate from a place of wholeness, authenticity, and joy.

• A woman who seeks freedom, peace, and adventure without apology, fear, or guilt.

• A woman who leads with her heart, no matter how vulnerable it feels.

• A woman who surrenders control and gently rides the currents of today’s river.

• A woman who walks into every space believing I belong there.

• A woman who is patiently waiting for the love I know I deserve.

• A woman who consciously raises the vibration of every interaction, every moment I touch.

This is, of course, an ideal. Rachel 3.0 won’t show up all the time, but Expansion is leading me to this landmark in the journey of becoming. And one thing you should know about me – I’m always up for a road trip.

[Photo: Birthday weekend in one of my favorite sunset spots in Baja – La Fonda.]