“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.” – Nelson Mandela

Every year around Fourth of July, I reflect deeply on what freedom means to me. Of course, there is a recounting of my family’s history of immigrating here when I was 7 years old, the freedom I have as woman to pursue an education, start a business, and make my own living, the freedom to study theology and spirituality, and the freedom to write this blog, even if it’s critical of our great nation at times.

But more than legal or physical freedom, I am reminded of the emotional and spiritual freedom that comes from exploring my own wants, desires, needs, and natural wiring. I have the freedom to do the things that bring me joy, love the people I want choose to, and experience life on my terms. I was not always this unshackled.

Five years ago during this week, I was officially set free from a marriage that held my heart in bondage, and I am so, so grateful to my ex- for having the courage to leave. At the time, there was social expense to him, but he played a critical role in my journey, setting me on a path to examine my own sense of self-worth and identity. It was the start of healing things I didn’t know were broken.

A little over a year ago, my father passed away after years battling bipolar, cancer, and Parkinson’s. His body and mind were set free from disease and pain, and I was free from the responsibility of being in charge of his healthcare. It was the start of healing pieces of that relationship that never could have while he was alive.

Here is what I learned through my divorce and the death of my father:

On the other side of loss – once the tears have slowed to a slow trickle and you look up to feel the warmth of the sun on your face – is always, always freedom.

This has been true all my life, yet I still try with all my might to hold on to the things I know and love. There’s nothing evil or wrong with that, but learning to let go of attachments, expectations, and “should’s” leads me one step closer to true joy and freedom.

Looking inward to understand how I’ve played a role in every piece of my life – a victim to none of it – helps me live with more intention and purpose.

Accepting and inviting loss invites new depths of my own liberation. And I’m ready to let freedom ring.

p.s. I love Fourth of July and also want to acknowledge that last year, I was introduced to Juneteenth – the celebration of the end of slavery; this year, it was made a federal holiday by the Biden-Harris administration. So this week, I am celebrating the freedoms we do have alongside the freedoms we still need to fight for.

[Photo by Designecologist from Pexels]