Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way. – James 1:2–4 (The Message)

I’m going to be honest – the first 200 times I read the above verse in James, I thought it was bullshit. I mean, who wants to consider suffering joy?? I don’t want to suffer at all, let alone be glad about it! I want comfort. I want easy. I want fun.

Unfortunately, in my own life, little to no growth occurs during times of plenty. When everything is going as planned, I tend to cruise and not contemplate. I practice gratitude but don’t consider the areas of my heart I need to examine deeply. But as I’ve shared in a previous post, the comfortable, easy, fun times are that much sweeter when we know we have survived and conquered the challenging ones.

When I see friends around me experience great suffering – like the loss of a child, a strained marriage, compromised health – and witness their grit and grace coupled with thanksgiving, I am inspired and amazed. I’ve even had friends tell me they are grateful for the hardship because they know it is producing perseverance. They recognize it is building character. And they believe that the season will end.

Like a tree whose roots stretch wider and grow stronger through winds and storms, we can become deeply grounded after a trial.

During the first few months of separation, after my divorce, and with the recent waves of grief I am working through, I now understand what those brave friends were talking about. There is a strange satisfaction that comes from processing the ick, knowing that I am releasing the old, making space for the new.

It provokes a fresh dependence on the Divine and – because I’m lucky – my friends when I’m in a state of utter brokenness. I practice (willingly) accepting help from others. I surrender control day to day, and sometimes even moment to moment.

Hopefully, in the process I’m maturing, building the muscle of resilience, and marching down the road to becoming well-developed. It also elicits an apology and the admission, “I get it, James. I finally get it.”

[Photo by Simon Wilkes on Unsplash]